We see the world through the lenses of our personal emotional experiences, and through these experiences, we create our own emotional landscapes. Our egos use this emotional landscape to create stories, and from these stories, we evolve thoughts and emotional reaction to them.
For example, I have always struggled with jealousy, and perceived my partners engaging in relationships with other women. This was seen through the lens of my personal past experiences, and then these create insecurities within me with my ego’s thoughts about infidelity. In these situations, I cope by being aware of my ego and identifying these thoughts objectively as that of my ego and not my true self, and do not react to them. I also use reality checks to see if my ego is creating these fears or are these thoughts reflected in reality.
Recently, I saw photos of the woman who had an affair with an ex-boyfriend. She recently changed here name by adding here husband’s name, and I saw loving pictures of her with her husband. They actually looked very happy together, and I realized that her affair actually brought her closer to her husband. Even though she is still in touch with that ex-boyfriend, the fear within me just fell away. I do not resent her contacts with him, and I find her non-threatening now. I realize that I have much to offer to someone and another woman simply cannot take that away from me.
My self-esteem has improved significantly, and if fact, I feel that my future will be bright, joyous, and peaceful regardless of who I am with or even if I am alone. I have come to realize that I do not need another to feel complete within myself, and the bliss and joy I feel everyday give me this insight. This understanding allows me to unfold my life as it is intended. Blessings to you, Brooke (Copyright 2013 Burrowing Owl Press/Brooke Chang with All Rights Reserved)