PATHWAY TO JOY AND HEALING

My girlfriends and I spend hours talking about how to heal a broken heart. Men have come and gone, and many we prefer to be gone.  But there are times, we have ones who steal our hearts or wound them pretty deeply.  These are the ones we have trouble letting go.

I want to share what I did recently to permanently leave a dysfunctional and dependent relationship that caused me much pain and hurt.  First, romantic relationship resemble our relationships with our parents.  They mirror something in our relationships with our Moms and Dads.  So, try to identify what that is.  The irony is that the more the person resembles our parents, the more we tend to love and be in love with that person.  I needed to acknowledge this to myself that there is something not quite right with this dynamic. We must come to this truth and acceptance about ourselves.

Second, then I began to try to see my reality that can be very difficult since our egos will create a reality that reflect its wishes.  I recommend following your instinct.  What is your inner voice telling you?  In my situation, I couldn’t reconcile that the man I loved did not include me in his life.  There were no mentions of me in his blogs that were positive, or any mentions of me to his family and friends.  He continued to reference this woman who has been his lover and serves as his spiritual teacher in his blogs and writings, and even introduced her to his family although she is married to another.  Try to look at your reality to find your truth, then accept that truth about this relationship, which is the most difficult part of this process.

Third, then it took some courage and strength to confront the man I loved.  Be prepared to leave the relationship and that is what I did.  I prepared a game plan as to how I would address the infidelity issue in that we need to be prepared to leave, or ask for a change to the relationship.  In my case, I decided to permanently leave because I do not see any possible changes or improvement to this relationship.

Finally, If you decide to permanently leave, return to the real world. Begin to take on new projects, activities, and meet new people. Take on a new hobby, or join a new club.  Through these activities be open to meeting others, and truly believe that you want to meet others.  Go on some dates without getting deeply involved, and I always recommend becoming friends first without sleeping with them.  Sex complicates everything.  If you are too raw emotionally to date, just make lots of friends first. I am taking a scuba certification class to learn to scuba dive for my sailing trip this summer around Corsica, a French Island in the Mediterranean Sea.

The key is to start living your own independent life because we don’t need others to complete our lives.  This is just my personal healing experience, so take away what you may find helpful. ~ Eternal light and love to you, Brooke (Copyright 2013 Kundalini Spirit with All Rights Reserved)