As I continue my ascension work and progress through my spiritual journey, I have discovered the secret to emotional recovery. One of the most important changes we may see to our emotional landscape is that we give up our hope to change the past, and realize we can live and deserve a better life than the one we have lived. Before this realization, we first must accept that our life up to this point may not be healthy or beneficial. There is an AHA moment!
Let me give you an example. In the past two years, I was involved with an emotionally wounded man. During this on again off again relationship, I was emotionally injured and hurt by this man. After each incident of injury and hurt, I forgave him, and return to this unhealthy codependent relationship. Each time, I held out hope that he would be different this time, that he could return my love, and that he was more healed. Although there were improvements, they were to satisfy his romantic relationship with another woman who he is in love with.
Our ego creates outcomes with others we want to control. Our hopes and wishes are caused by our emotional landscapes that need to resolve hurts and wounds from childhood and the past with our parents. In my situation, I wanted to believe that my unconditional love for this man can somehow change the outcome that I had with my father to a different one. I wanted to rescue him, but this is impossible. Only he can heal himself. I wanted this man to love me when I my father earlier could not. The only way to healing for myself was come to this realization that my father is who he is, and that this man also is who he is. This man cannot change for me to result in a different outcome than I had earlier in my life with my father.
When I finally realized that I deserve better treatment, and that I want the man I love to be in love with me, I came to the conclusion that I must give up hope for this man that will never materialize. In coming to this conclusion, I was able to end this relationship permanently. I asked this man to promise never to return, and hearing these words from my mouth made me realize my own true wishes. By leaving this relationship, I am giving myself love. It is seeing our reality as it really is, and accepting this truth that can give us the courage to move on, find others who can return our love, and who can treat us more lovingly and with more care.
We all deserve to be loved in this way. It is believing this within ourselves that will help us see our truth clearly, and give us courage to move onto healthier, more loving and caring relationships. With this new found belief, I have found my way towards emotional recovery. ~ Brooke (Copyright 2013 Burrowing Owl Press/Brooke Chang with All Rights Reserved)