The Illusion of Fixing and Rescuing Others


In the course of my emotional recovery and spiritual work, I have observed those who spend a great deal of time fixing others or helping others recover emotionally.  In each of these circumstances, I have observe that the helpers frequently do not practice what they preach, and in fact, those who they help appear to surpass the helper in the emotional recovery process.

I have heard these complaints from many helpees about their helpers.   They are puzzled as to why the helpers are not themselves moving forward in the ascension process at the same rate as they?  This is the problem.  The helpee’s energy is focused and directed on themselves in their emotional and spiritual work, while the helper’s energy also is focused on the helpee’s emotional healing.  Therefore, there is insufficient energy devoted to the helper’s own emotional healing process.

This lack of inward reflection by the the helper on his/her own issues becomes a disservice to himself or herself.  Many times, the helper does this on an unconscious level to avoid dealing with their own issues.  Other times, the helper’s self esteem or worth is bolstered or inflated to feel better about himself or herself, however, it is not a true improvement of their self esteem or worth.

My suggestion is to work on yourself first and foremost.  Each person must do their own emotional and spiritual work.   We can only support, inspire, and encourage others. This is why I have been reluctant to serve as a spiritual teacher or mentor to others.  As much as we believe we have the power to rescue or fix others, it is only an illusion of our own making. Blessings of light to you, Brooke (Copyright 2013 Burrowing Owl Press/Brooke Chang with All Rights Reserved)

Author: Brooke Chang

Hi, I'm Brooke who will be taking you on a healing journey to a more joyful life. I will serve as your guide on this healing journey sharing my insights, knowledge and experiences. I hope you will join me!

8 thoughts on “The Illusion of Fixing and Rescuing Others”

  1. I am usually a helper and this is satisfactory.
    I admit that my progress sometimes is slow.
    I subscribe to that we are all best off to believe that we did the best that we were able to do and that there is room for improvement. Taking some time to complete a daily assessment is helpful.
    – Eric


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