I have been suffering with negative thoughts and physical ailments from my past, and have fallen back to old patterns of behaviors. This has come as a surprise to me as I wasn’t aware if I don’t practice mindfulness or being present regularly, that I will fall back to old patterns of thinking and behaving. I also realized that my “spiritual purpose” of helping traumatized college students really fed my ego although it began from a higher consciousness.
I am trying to get back on track for my spiritual life, and have been practicing Eckhart Tolle’s “How to Control Emotional Triggers.” For the first time in a while, I felt joy and lightness when I remained in the present moment. It felt beautiful and I cried as I remember this feeling from an earlier time, but I thought I had lost my way by being stuck in my old negative thoughts and feelings. However, I am happy to know that the enlightened path is never very far away when we seek this path, and I am so thankful for finding my way back.
I felt a deep level of inner peace and inner stillness today that I have not felt in a while. It is a beautiful place to reside instead of the chaotic thoughts and chatter of ego. This has given me renewed hope and energy to tackle the spiritual work ahead of me. I feel grateful and relieved to know that all things are possible when we strive for a higher consciousness. (Copyright 2019 Awakening Journey with All Rights Reserved)
Pathway to Joy and Healing 
Our ‘old bits’ always come up in our future, and for very good reasons. They show us how far we have come, or not in dealing with our fears. If we convince ourselves that we are fine but we keep reacting, then there are still things to deal with. But if our reactions to them get less and less, then we are dealing with those fears.
They are a lifetime thing those fears so that even when we finally see and understand their cause, it takes quite some time to gradually remove them from our way of being. Like a divorce, just because you sign the paper doesn’t mean the pain will suddenly go away. We must come to terms with all the changes that this new understanding means in all of our life, as it affects us in many ways.
You have been through a lot kind lady, be gentle with your heart and the understanding will follow ❤️
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I so agree, and keep moving forward with Two steps forward and one step back! Sending love and light!❤️🙏🏼
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Thank you for your honesty. I have been through something very similar despite many years of of spiritual work and feeling a lot of inner peace. These things serve to bring us to an even higher state of consciousness and show us what still blocks us from achieving it. A x
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Thank you for your kind words. Sending love and continued healing! ❤️🙏🏼
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