Part of emotional and spiritual growth is our willingness to leave behind our past. We must give up the story that we tell ourselves of who we are, the roles we play in our families, and the persona we portray of ourselves to others. In the three years since my Kundalini rising and beginning my spiritual journey, I have attempted to let go of my past including the chaos of my childhood, the hurt from my childhood abuse, and my continuing to play the role of the victim and scapegoat in the dynamics with others in my life.
Much of giving up my past is to giving up the chaos and destruction of my past. It is refusing to play into the manipulations involved in my family dynamics. My family had many secrets, deceptions, and lies, such as my childhood sexual abuse, my father’s extramarital affairs, secret addictions, and even my brother’s sexual orientation that only I suspect. These secrets destroyed the fabric of my family.
As an adult, I replayed these roles that were assigned to me by my family. I found others in my life who duplicated these dynamics. I try very hard now to disclose secrets, deceptions, and lies, and no longer agree to conspire with others in these situations. When one person does something that I find hurtful to others, I will talk with that person about their actions, but ultimately, I will disclose their actions to others. I no longer agree to cover up others’ hurtful behaviors.
Leaving behind these dynamics involving hurtful behaviors, manipulations, and covering up secrets have allowed me to move beyond the dysfunctions of my past, and the people in my life that still behave in this way. I am now attracting very different people into my life who have different values and behaviors as I am changing myself within. May you find your path forward and leave behind your past, Brooke (Copyright 2014 Kundalini Spirit with All Rights Reserved)

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