PATHWAY TO JOY AND HEALING

One deep rooted memory I have from childhood was when my mother sat huddled on the floor of our garage in our home while crying uncontrollably.  As a child, I knew why she was crying and how despondent and sad her life was.   My mother has mental illness, and became dependent upon my father to care for her, and lives the life of a victim like her mother before her.

My father loved many women other than my mother, and this broke her heart.  Frankly, this broke my heart too, and my family was forever broken by his infidelities.  Without discretion or respect for his own family, he carried on these affairs through deceptions and misrepresentations, and even brought these women into our home.

This betrayal was deeply ingrained in my heart and conscious mind.  As a child,  I promised myself that I would not end up like my mother, a sad and heart-broken woman. I made this promise to myself, because I am worthy and deserve more than the treatment my mother received in her life.  I deserve to be loved and adored in my life, and not the second or third woman to be loved.

I understand that it was my mother’s choice to stay with my father as she deeply loved him and was dependent upon him.  However, I have made different choices for my life. May you find the love you deserve in your life. (Copyright 2015 Awakening Journey with All Rights Reserved)