PATHWAY TO JOY AND HEALING

I want to share my experiences about destructive patterns of behaviors as I have been forced to see and acknowledge these destructive patterns in my life.  There are big patterns such as repeating the same behavioral patterns we experienced in our childhoods now in our adults lives.  Then, there are repeating behavioral patterns with the same person, such as an abusive or unhealthy relationship.  I have had problems with both.

What I have observed is that our egos do not allow us to see these behavioral patterns easily within our own lives. However,we are able to see these patterns very clearly with others, and in fact, we are happy to point these out to others. This ability to see inward is not an easy one, and most of us, including myself, have struggled to see these behavioral patterns that appear obvious to others.

The technique I use to be able to see past my ego into my own reality is called looking into the mirror.  This is how it works.  I will choose someone in my life who mirrors some aspect of my life, such as someone who lived through childhood abuse or experienced trauma.  I will observe their life patterns or relationship abuse patterns, and frequently, something will ring true about their situation to me.

Once this happens, I realize that I am likely experiencing the same patterns as this individual.  Some of the patterns are uncannily similar sometimes down to the number of months that these patterns will repeat.  One such pattern that I have observed about myself involved a pattern of three or four months.  During these months, I will suffer a rejection or failure, and will revert back to a destructive behavioral pattern of returning to a prior unhealthy relationship or begin another similarly unhealthy relationship.  

The key to breaking our behavioral patterns is awareness not to repeat these patterns again. As I am trying very hard to heal my emotional wounds, I will likely revert back to these destructive patterns until I have healed completely.  Another way to determine if we are repeating the same behavioral patterns is to ask ourselves if we have been here before.  Have I experienced these feelings before? Have I experienced this hurt before?  Does this remind me of a similar past experience?  

Awareness will allow us to see the road we are walking down again, and prevent us from becoming stuck on our journeys.  Keeping a diary or journal is another great way of tracking patterns of negative behavior.  As this blog is a diary of my spiritual journey, I have reviewed my past posts and recognized that I have repeated the same behavioral patterns quite a few times before.  May you find your unhealthy patterns and break them.  Blessings of love, Brooke (Copyright 2014 Kundalini Spirit with All Rights Reserved)